


Is this okay?

by Gracefanfics



Series: remus & harry [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Self-Doubt, social interaction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-03
Updated: 2017-04-28
Packaged: 2018-09-06 03:10:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8732497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gracefanfics/pseuds/Gracefanfics
Summary: Remus reaches out to Harry during his third year. The thing is Remus and Harry are both more than a little awkward and it has been a long time since Remus reached out to anyone. It's a lot harder than he thought it would be. Especially because he is sure this breaks teacher-student boundaries.Mcgonagall is so done with her loins suffering and being idiots. God knows the both of them could use a familiar connection.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> As with every story, it's not editing. 
> 
> Enjoy

Remus hesitated a moment after he helped Harry up. He knew Harry would like to go again. But it was worrisome how affected the boy, James boy, his cub, was by the dementors, even the fake ones. But maybe...it went far beyond the teacher student relationship that they had. And didn't that just burn. That he was professor instead of uncle. But maybe...if it kept him from pushing himself too far…  
“harry. “ he spoke before the child could demand another go. Such stubbornness that was both Lily and james. “perhaps instead of another round, you would like a cup a tea? “ it's awkward offering. And harry doesn't bother hiding his confusion.  
“er… Alright. “ Remus can tell he's only accepted for politeness but maybe. Maybe in time it'll be because he enjoys it. 

 

Remus lead the way back to his office. And set about making tea the Muggle way just to have something to do. Embedded and awkward to have done this but others done and he must as well make the most of it. When he turned around tea tray in hand. He found Harry standing in the doorway. Good god he knew that this was not exactly comfortable for either of them. But he thought the boy might have sat down at least. He nodded to a chair. “you can have a seat , if you like. “ harry ducked his head in embarrassment and muttered a barely audible apology before sitting. Remus prepared the cups of tea before sitting down. He slid across the table a bar of chocolate. “for the last lesson. “  
Harry took it and took a small bite. “thanks. “  
They lapsed into silence for a long moment.  
“you are quite good at defense. “  
Harry looked down again. Embarrassed perhaps? and fiddled with his tea cup “thank you ...it's nice to finally have a competent teacher”  
Remus nodded towards Harry's in touched tea cup. “you can drink that. I haven't poisoned it you know” they were almost the same words he had used on the train. That fact seemed to amuse the messy haired boy in front of him, as harry let out a tiny breath of air, that sounded like a cut off chuckle and offered up a small smile before taking a sip of the tea. They both sat in silence for a time. Remus trying to fish for topics of conversation, harry wondering if he done anything wrong. Eventually the boy worked up the courage to ask. “sir...I was just wondering if you asked me here for a reason?”  
Remus mentally cursed himself. What was he thinking. Of course , he thought he was in trouble. “no. Well...you're not in trouble. If that's what you are thinking. Offering tea just seemed like the best way to get you to take a much needed break. “ Remus offered him what he hoped was a comforting smile.  
“oh. “ was Harry's only verbal response. But it was obvious that he was much more relaxed than before and took another sip of tea.  
Remus let out a slow breath. What was he doing? Having tea with a student ? That had to be crossing the line somewhere. But could anyone blame him? When he was suppose to be the kids honorary uncle? But you're not. He remind himself firmly. He only knows you as his teacher. Finally he met Harry's eyes, Lilly eyes, “you don't have to stay you know. I understand that this is more than a tad awkward. And I'm sure your friends are wondering where you've been. “  
“er...alright. “ harry stood up and waited a moment. Before turning to the door. Halfway there he turned back around. “thanks. “ he said then left.  
“Next Saturday then. “ Remus called after him. Before letting his head fall with a heavy thud against his desk. He was such an idiot.

 

After , Remus had let himself wallow in self pity/hatred. He came to the conclusion that he would need to let Minerva (and wasn't that just weird, referring to her by first name. But still she insisted. ) aware of the blunder he had made. Just in case Harry complained about teachers over stepping bounds. Seeing as it was late now, he would seek her out tomorrow


	2. Chapter 2

Remus was loitering outside Minerva's office, stalling. Still gryffindor courage and all that. Just as he was about to stop his pacing and knock, the door opened.   
“we're you planning on coming inside anytime soon, Remus? If not. I suggest you take your pacing elsewhere. “   
Remus couldn't help but hunch into himself a little at her words, as if he was a student once more. “apologies Minerva, I was just about to knock.”  
She studied him for a minute, before stepping aside. “it's no matter now, come in.sit. “   
Once they were both settled. Minerva fixed the younger teacher with a sharp look over her glasses. “what is bothering you?”   
Remus forced his hands to lay flat on his lap and took a deep breath. “I think. I have made a mistake. “   
“Remus, you have barely been teaching for a month. Of course you have made a mistake. Now…”   
He cut his old teacher off. “involving Harry Potter. “   
Minerva sat straighter in her chair and her gazed sharpened. Mistakes where mister Potter was concerned tended to lead to the boy almost dying. Poppy would not be pleased. She normally had a few months between potters visits to prepare.   
“where is mister Potter now?”   
Remus shot her a confused look. “with his friends I would presume. “   
“so he is not in desperate need of medical attention?”   
Remus’s confusion mounted. “not that I am aware of. “   
“when did you see him last? “  
“yesterday evening. “  
“ well that's certainly enough time for mister Potter…yes well. We can hope.”  
“ what?” was all remus could manage.  
“past mistakes involving mister Potter ended with students in danger. But no matter if you are sure mister Potter is not in need of medical attention then we may proceed. Tell me what has happened. “   
Remus desperately wanted to ask what that was about. But saw that his old teacher would not be answering any more questions on the topic. Because what could have possibly happened in the past two years that mistakes are assumed to be lethal now? He mentally made a note to find out what she had been talking about. But did as she requested and told her of his interactions with harry. How he had requested extra lessons to learn the patronus charm. How he was progressing nicely. Even if this was only the third lessons. And how he had rather botched it by inviting the boy to tea. He went on to explain that Dumbledore had asked him not to encourage unnecessary attachment by telling tales of his parents, because he had his own family and it wouldn't due for him to dwell on the past. So tea had progressed in an awkward silence and Harry had spent the whole time thinking he might be in trouble. Remus finished by saying that this surely broke some teacher student relationship and that he had wanted to let Minerva know incase Harry filed a complaint. 

 

When Remus finished Minerva studied him over her glasses for a moment before softening and pushed a tin over to him. “have a biscuit. “ 

 

Remus relaxed somewhat at her words as he took a biscuit and closed the tin before handing it back. It was Minerva's way of saying you aren't in trouble. 

 

She considered him for a moment more , wondering how best to proceed. Finally she sighed. “honestly Remus? I have only heard Mr.Potter complain about Severus and perhaps Mr. Malfoy. I doubt he will complain that you made him some tea. “   
Remus tried to protest but Minerva cut him off “what I find far more impressive is that Mr.Potter has asked you not only questions, but for help. “   
Remus set the biscuit down. “why would that be impressive?”   
Minerva pressed her lips together. “I know of only of two times Mr.Potter ask for help. And as far as I'm aware, he has never asked a question of a teacher in or out of class.”   
Remus blinked in surprise. “never?” even the most anxious kids managed to ask questions every now and again.   
“never. “ she repeated. “I would encourage you to continue having tea after your lessons. Do you want my advice?”   
Remus nodded , “please. “   
“find an excuse to keep the lessons and the tea going. Tell him about his parents. Mr. Potter clings to any information he gets on them. It would do him some good, to have a connection to them. I think it'll do you some good as well.” 

 

Remus left his old teacher's office feeling like he had more questions than answers. Dumbledore had said almost the exact opposite of Minerva, that Harry had a family. That it wouldn't do to interfere. But Minerva had loved the idea of him and Harry bonding. And why had Harry never asked questions or for help? Why were mistakes almost fatal? What had happened here? 

 

Head spinning, Remus returned to the paperwork he needed to get done before his next class. It might take a while but he would find his answers


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> school is out. so I'm celebrating by updating everything!! 
> 
> nothing is edited. sorry not sorry.
> 
> I have no idea if this makes any kind of sense. it's like four in the morning. sue me.

Remus spent a few days wondering what he should do. And then wondering how to go about it without freaking harry out and how to do it without alerting Dumbledore, he must have had a reason for not wanting him to reach out to the boy. 

Finishing the last of the school related paper work, remus reached for a blank sheet a parchment. It might have been a life time since he had made a plan, but surely he remembered how. Starting with what he needed to accomplish.  
Get to know Harry  
Without Dumbledore knowing  
Answers to the question of why mistakes are assumed to be lethal.   
Great. Now that the easy part was done. How to implement it?   
/////  
Next saturday really came all too soon. And so too did the end of the dementor lesson, cut short once again by Remus’s growing horror that harry had no concept of not pushing himself beyond injury. The boy did not care about the forming bruises on his hands and shoulders from falling and fainting. Or the way his arm shook. Or how he would start to lose color. Remus often found himself cutting these lessons short as worry bubbled within him. Even monsters are capable of worry he thought to himself as harry’s shield failed and he fainted once again. And that was quiet enough of that. 

“Come on. Up you get.” he told harry once he woke up. “Here. chocolate. Eat.”  
“Thanks.”   
the statement had become a ritual for them. Always the same. Up you get. Chocolate. Eat. and harry’s whispered thanks. And then after a moment.   
“I can go again.” 

“Let’s leave it for now.” remus responded. And then quickly continued as he recognized the stubborn glint in his eyes. A look that was much lilly as james and for a split second remus doesn’t remember who he is talking to. The pain is as sharper than any claws that had dug into his skin on the night of the full moon. Who ever had said that pain faded with time was a liar and should be skinned. “How about I tell you about your parents while you rest?” 

The words were like magic, sending life back into the boy’s body. Replacing what the fake dementor had took. “Really?”   
God. Minerva hadn’t been kidding when she hinted that no one had told him about Lily and james.   
“Of course. We were friends you know. “   
“ I didn’t.” came his quiet reply.   
Remus. Was long practice with masking and containing his anger. It was practice well put into use. He gestured for harry to make himself comfortable.   
“I met james first. “ Remus began. “He was insistent that we be friends. He was like that with everyone you know? I admit that I didn’t know what to do with that. There weren’t many children were I was before hogwarts…” they spent the rest of the day until diner came like that. Relaxing in the room. Harry soaking up every small detail that remus parted with. It hurt to remember...to talk about his long gone friends. To edit things out about ...certain persons. But it was a relief too. Remus had had no one to share his grief with for thirteen years. He might have gotten a bit carried away.


End file.
